You’have a problem with telling physics jokes. Quite often the people don’t get your jokes. You’re doing it all wrong. Only a true physics nerd can understand your jokes. So let’s start.
- A farmer was having issues with his chickens. The majority of the sudden, they are all becoming ill, and he doesn’t recognize what isn’t right with them. After attempting every ordinary mean, he calls a biologist, a chemist, and a physicist to check whether they can make sense of what isn’t right. So the biologist takes a gander at the chickens, looks at them a bit, and says he has no idea what could not be right with them. At that point, the chemist takes a few tests and makes a few estimations. However, he can’t arrive at any conclusions either. So the physicist tries. He remains there and takes a gander at the chickens for quite a while without touching them or anything. After a while, he begins jotting without end in a notebook. At last, after a few abhorrent calculations, he shouts, ‘I have it! But it only works for spherical chickens in a vacuum.
- A lady said to her spouse: For my birthday I need something that will quicken from 0 to 100 in 3 seconds.”Her spouse purchased her washroom scales.For Christmas, she requests that he purchase her something with an “i” in the name(thinking iPod, iPad, iPhone and so forth.).He purchased her an i-ron. She hit him on the head with it because she was i-rate.
- One day in class, Richard Feynman was discussing precise energy. He depicted rotation matrices and said that they didn’t drive. He said that Sir William Hamilton found noncommutativity one night when he was going out for a stroll in his garden with Lady Hamilton. As they sat down on a seat, there was a minute of enthusiasm. It was then that he found that AB did not equal to BA.
- Every one of the physicists is playing hide and seek. Einstein is the “den” and stands against the wall with his eyes shut and checks till 100 to empower every one of the physicists to run and stow away. At the number of 100 Einstein pivots and discovers Newton remaining there.He shouts, “Newton, you are out!” Newton says, “No, I ‘m not!”Einstein says, “Yes, you are. I can see you here before me”.Newton says, “I’m not out. Pascal is.”Einstein is somewhat befuddled and begins to scratch his head and facial hair.Newton says “Here, Let me clarify.”He draws a starting point meter by one meter on the floor and stands amidst it and says,”Newton per meter square is a Pascal, so it’s Pascal who’s out not me”
- Ivan Ivanovich, the considerable Russian scientist, does an investigation. He needs to know how quick a thermometer tumbles down. He picks a thermometer and a light, a candle light. He drops both from the third floor and perceives that they are coming to the ground in the meantime. Ivan Ivanovich, the considerable Russian scientist, writes in his book: A thermometer falls with the speed of light.
- A mathematician and a physicist consent to a psychological experiment. The mathematician is placed in a seat in an extensive vacant room, and a delightful bare lady is set on a bed at the other end of the room. The psychologist clarifies, “You are to stay in your seat. Like clockwork, I will move your seat to a position somewhere between its momentum area and the lady on the bed.” The mathematician takes a gander at the psychologist in revulsion. “What? I’m not going to experience this. You know I’ll never achieve the bed!” And he gets up and tempests out. The psychologist takes a note on his clipboard and ushers the physicist in. He clarifies the circumstance, and the physicist’s eyes light up and he begins dribbling. The psychologist is a touch confounded. “Don’t you understand that you’ll never reach her?” The physicist grins and answers, “obviously! Yet, I’ll get sufficiently near her for every single practical purpose!”
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